We usually put off making difficult decisions. When we look at what makes them difficult, we find that there are unpleasant feelings involved, and those feelings are not being honored.
Here’s how it goes for me when I’m avoiding dealing with feelings regarding a decision: The subject will pop up for the umpteenth time. I’ll mull it over just a bit until I start experiencing the underlying feelings, and before I get too uncomfortable, I’ll look for the easiest excuse to stop thinking about it.
The excuse is usually something like, “Well, I don’t have to decide on that until next week or so.”
Just that quickly, the decision is dropped, but because it’s unresolved, it will rear its ugly head soon. In fact, I’ll go through that process again and again with increased frequency and stress as time runs out on me.
This is not a pleasant way to go about things. It’s much better for me to honor those feelings, to go ahead and feel them, even if they are very uncomfortable. In doing so, I’m able to look at the facts and the feelings involved and actually make a difficult decision rather easily. And with that decision will come relief from the uncomfortable feelings and relief from that horrible cycle of avoidance.
Sometimes we’re not even aware that there are underlying feelings involved. We keep putting off making a decision about something without analyzing why we’re procrastinating, but if we look deep enough, we’ll find the feelings lurking.
Other times, we go ahead and make decisions without ever tapping into how we feel about them, and later we wonder why we’re unhappy with our decision. This is especially true with career decisions where we value money and security over how we feel.
It’s important to honor our feelings. They have a way of returning until dealt with anyway, so it’s best to get it over with sooner rather than later.
Click on the video below to watch me share more about this.