Recently I’ve been going through a self-imposed tough time. I decided to taper off from medicine I’d been taking for many years because the side effects of the drug were outweighing its benefits.
The process has been very challenging, but more recently, I have felt closer to being my full self than ever before, and I believe that the closeness, the self-knowing, will continue to unfold.
At some point, I will write in detail about what I’ve been through in hopes that I will help others who want to wean off of this drug.
But for now I want to share about some of the methods that I used to help myself feel better when I was honestly feeling like shit. These tools would be helpful for anyone going through a difficult transition or a difficult time. Thankfully, I’m still using these methods even though I’m feeling much better. It’s funny how we incorporate healthy things into our lives to help in tough times and mistakenly give them up once we’re feeling better. I don’t plan on doing that.
The most important method I’ve been using is asking myself “How am I feeling?” I’ve been asking this at least once an hour lately. Many times the answer has been “I feel disoriented and I can’t concentrate.”
The second part of this method is accepting the answer, which in my case meant accepting that the work I felt I should be doing wasn’t going to get done. It just wasn’t. The sooner I accepted this, the better for my mind and body. Every moment I complained about my inability to work was a moment that delayed my healing, and I had more than a few of those moments at the start.
The next method I used was to respond to what my body told me. If it told me it was tired, I went to take a nap. (Note: I’m self-employed so I was able to clear my schedule enough so that naps were doable. Also, my boss knows I’m super productive after taking one.) If my body told me it was anxious, I took action to ground myself through meditation, going for a walk, playing guitar (playing an instrument or singing is very grounding) and/or applying grounding essential oils to the bottoms of my feet.
Another method I employed was exercise. For me, exercise has so many wonderful attributes. The act of exercising grounds me and calms me. My stress is reduced or disappears. I have more energy during the day. I’m more focused in thought. I fall asleep easier and sleep longer and more soundly. The list goes on and on.
I also shared how I was feeling with friends and family. I found this very difficult at times. I was afraid that if I told someone what I was going through they might worry about me or make a big deal about it, but I knew that if I didn’t tell them they would be wondering why I was acting a bit off. I made myself say something in each case and I was happy with the level of support I received from everyone I told.
I asked for help from my partner. When I began tapering off, there were times when I wasn’t sure I felt good enough to make healthy decisions. I often asked Janet to help me make choices. I would say something like, “I’m so sleepy that I’m having trouble finishing writing this article. Should I soldier on or take a nap and come back to it?” Of course, Janet was very patient with me and helped by advising me to make decisions that would elevate my healing.
I meditated and asked for help from my spirit guides. During one of my discussions with my spiritual team I received the message that I would benefit greatly if I stop expecting and started experiencing. This was not the first time that spirit had warned me that my expectation of feeling badly was exacerbating my symptoms. Once I decided to go with the flow and just experience the day, things improved.
I also sought out psychic readings to ask about what I could do for myself to help my mind and body handle the reduction in medicine. I was told in a reading from a good friend of mine that my outlook was more important than I thought and that I should set a date for when I would be medicine free. That way I could start positively imagining what life would be like without it. I’m happy to say that I beat that date by 4 months!
Lastly, and quite unlike me, I pulled cards. I usually only pull cards with Janet, but I was alone and in need of support and the idea to use the cards popped into my head. I am by no means an expert tarot reader but you don’t have to be in order to receive great insight for yourself. I chose one card from The Wild Unknown Tarot deck and two supporting cards from The Wild Unknown Animal Spirit deck. The Daughter of Pentacles showed that I was being quietly supported behind the scenes. The fish represented my present state of feeling lost in the current, without direction, and the eagle represents my strength in stepping into the unknown, moving forward in my transformation. I really needed all of that!
I’m feeling a lot more like myself now, actually, an even better self. This is mainly because my body’s chemistry is finding its equilibrium, but I know that these self-care methods allowed me to feel as good as I could have along the journey.